


When worlds collide ...

by Nightalp, RavenX



Category: Now You See Me (2013), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: AU, And he really doesn't like bringing them to an Avengers-feast, BAMF Nick Fury, Bruce Banner is Dylan Rhodes, Bruce has a girlfriend, F/M, Good Loki, M/M, Thanksgiving, and a son
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-25
Updated: 2013-09-25
Packaged: 2017-12-24 15:25:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/941537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightalp/pseuds/Nightalp, https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenX/pseuds/RavenX
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Coulson: “Director Fury did send me to you. He'd like to know if you’re going to organize a dinner for the Avengers this year as well or are we going to celebrate with the other Shield agents which will be on duty?”<br/>“With the other agents together?!”, Tony shrieked terrified. “Shit, no! We would never be aloud to play strip poker." </p><p>Thanksgiving is just around the corner and Tony (Pepper) is organizing the Avengers Thanksgiving-feast. Not an easy task, considering who's coming - and who's trying to stay away. But Tony is having non of Bruce's solo and so he has to admit to having a familiy. A familiy almost as unusual as the Avengers themselves ...</p><p>Prepare for Tony being awesome, Steve being sweet, Bruce being nervous, Loki being an awesome cook, Fury being an awesome leader (and totally in love), Clint being funny, Natasha being cool, Phil being scary, Daniel being in love (and not admitting to it), Jack being in love too, and all the others being totally amused by their shenanigans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The plan

**Author's Note:**

> Our first attempt to write together.  
> The first chapters are already written and need only to be translated (yes, no native speakers), so updates shouldn't take to long.

“Wake up, sweetheart. There is breakfast waiting for you.”

Tony Stark pulled the blanket over his head and mumbled something which could mean something like _leave me alone, douche bag_.

“You won't get rid of me with something as primitive as that.”, explained Steve with an intolerable good humored and especially to _awake_ voice. “I brew an extra strong coffee for you. Your favorite blend.” After that he ordered Jarvis to open the shutters.

Glittering, _bright_ light streamed into the bedroom, through the little gaps of the blanket and right into Tony's drowsy eyes. 

Groaning agonized - who dared to wake up geniuses in need of rest in the middle of the night?! - he made the fort of blankets just a little bit more lightproof. But Steve didn't know any kind of mercy. He snatched one part of the cover and with one jerk he pulled it out of Tony's hands.

“Mean!!!”, Tony cried. “How dare you, you evil super soldier!”

To stop this not really unexpected rant Steve bowed down to his lover and captured his lips in a kiss. Immediately Tony opened his eyes and threw one arm around him, pulling him down. Steve put up with this for a little time before he freed himself out of the tight embrace his lover held him in with the help of his super strength and took a little step backwards. “I'm in the kitchen, sweetheart. If you want more.”

“Evil super soldier.”, Tony mumbled again.

“Not an evil one, Tony, just a hungry one who already ran through the whole park this morning. And he'd rather like to eat with you, cause eating alone is so _boring_.” With a last very explicit look he left Tony in their bedroom.

Tony plagued himself out of the four poster bed, dragged himself to the bathroom and took a quick shower. Freshly showered with still damp hair and dressed in a black Metallica shirt and jeans he entered the kitchen. Arriving there he really found a pot of “black as night” coffee which improved his mood as immediately as Steve had anticipated. After two cups of this tar like drink he was awake enough to linger in his typical Tony Stark manner to the counter where already two plates with bacon and eggs were waiting for him.

“One moment, please. The pancakes will be finished in a minute.”, Steve called from the stove.

“Fuck Steve, that's so inefficient. I'm for administering food intravenously or one of my delicious protein drinks ...”

“Sit down and start eating, Tony!”, commanded Steve without a blink of the eye. “Or do you want start fighting again? You know who will loose, do you?"

A light shudder creeped over Tony's spine as he remembered how the strong body of his lover pressed against his own.

Just in this moment Tony's phone started ringing and rescued him.

“Sorry, darling.”, Tony explained with an innocent look on his face. “Work is calling.”

The thought that _Tony Stark_ might abandon him for _work_ left Steve with an unbelieving snort on his lips.

“Hi, Tony, darling.”, Pepper answered on the other line with a sugar sweet voice and the alarm bells started ringing in Tony's head. “Can you _please_ tell Jarvis that he should let us in? It would be such a tragedy if I had to incite Phil on him.”

“Consider it done in this moment.”, he said quickly. But before he was able to ask why Pepper was visiting him so early in the break of dawn - it was barely 9 o'clock in the morning! - Steve grapped the phone out of Tony's hands and ended the call without hesitation.

“Hey.”, Tony protested.

“Sit down and eat. You have to be armed for the next disaster to come.”

Disaster. Oh yeah, that did describe Pepper's attempts to get him in the firm to work perfectly.

Just as he took a fork full of scrambled eggs the doors of the elevator opened and stepping out of it were Pepper and - Agent Coulson.

“Hey, you didn't say that you’re bringing Agent Agent with you.”, Tony protested.

“What can we do for you, Phil?”, Steve asked.

Tony whined and pointed accusingly at his lover. “Not you, too. Do you want to cheat on me? Is it his hair color, his perfect suit, his _fangirl look_?”

“Mmmm, let me think for a second ... _he_ surely would estimate my cooking.”, Steve replied untouched by this comment.

Tony stuck his tongue out.

“Speaking of food.”, Coulson interfered in the discussion which he had followed with an unmoved expression on his face. “We want to talk about the upcoming Thanksgiving dinner with you.”

“Oh you're not in official business here. You just have fooled me with your suit and your tie.”, Tony said bewildered.

Coulson, having gotten used to Tony Stark for quite some time by now, replied immediately: “I know my suits are always flawless.” Then he cleared his throat - not out of embarrassment but to change into his official mode - and continued with his speech: “Director Fury did send me to you. He'd like to know if you’re going to organize a dinner for the Avengers this year as well or are we going to celebrate with the other Shield agents which will be on duty?”

“With the other agents together?!”, Tony shrieked terrified. “Shit, _no_! We would never be allowed to play strip poker."

Pepper sighed. “And I thought Steve has a positive influence on you.”

“That only suffices in getting him to eat.”, Steve sighed but not without throwing a stern look Tony's way who once again ate a fork full of his eggs.

“Since _Tony organizing the feast_ in plaintext means that I'm in charge, we should dedicate ourselves to the guest list.", Pepper meant.

Tony made a disbelieving sound and swallowed his food. “No need to - all of us will come anyway. Who needs a guest list?” And Tony started: “Thor and his lovely girlfriend Jane, Tasha, Legolas and Agent Agent - no offense, Philli-boy.”, Tony said with a grin on his lips.

The answering smile on Phil's face promised Tony a lot of trouble and adversity. “None taken, Mr. Stark.”, Phil said.

Tony swallowed. Beside Pepper there was only one person in the whole universe that he really feared. Unfortunately this guy _was_ Agent "Agent" Phil Coulson.

Steve used the little pause and took over easily: “Director Fury and Loki, Bruce, Pepper and her Mr. Secret.” He smiled at her and she smirked back; 'til this day she didn't reveal to anyone the name of her beloved one. “And Darcy of course as Jane's best friend ... and her actual boyfriend ... who’s the lucky one this time?” He carried the plate full of delicious pancakes to the counter and placed it there next to a can of maple syrup.

“I don’t know, but it will probably change in the next two weeks anyway.”, Pepper said.

“Hey, did you notice that Bruce will be the only one without a date?”, Tony interrupted. “I would say we’re going to find him one, aren't we, darling?”, he asked innocently.

“We have to make him participate in the first place.”, Steve considered diplomaticly. He would rather face super villains of Lokis caliber on a daily base than interfere in others love lifes. Oops - he _did_ face super villains on a daily base ...

"Poppycock, he will appear this time. We just won't let any of his petty excuses count. As if he would destroy New York City once again.” After a short pause he asked: “What about Maria Hill?”

“I think she's seeing someone.”, Coulson meant simply before he grapped a chair and accepted a pancake with syrup from Steve, rolled it and took a hearty bite.

Pepper followed his example, but not before Steve - the last gentlemen on earth - handed her plate, knife and fork.

“Well, I could give Rhianna a ring, or Paris Hilton - I believe I've still got her number on speed dial.”, Tony added.

“Don't even think about it!”, Pepper shouted, while Phil raised his eyebrows and Steve asked confused: “Who is Paris Hilton?”

“A rich, blond playmate and a bitch.”, Pepper explained. “She made my life a living hell every time I had to threw her out.”

Steve's face became serious. “Then I have to insist that you delete her number immediately, sweetheart.”, he said and his tone gave no room for arguments.

Grumbling Tony accepted his fate. “Ok, then no Paris Hilton.”

 


	2. Only under pressure

“Bru-Dad?”

Bruce looked up from his simmering sauce to look at his son. "Yes, Daniel?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

Bruce eyes narrowed. This simple question sounded very dangerous if you knew Daniel.

"I think you already did that.", Bruce answered.

Daniel rolled his eyes at this comment. Sometimes you really notice that his dad`s best friend was called Tony Stark. He grinned at this thought and continued: "It's about thanksgiving, dad!"

"What about it?" Bruce asked, not sure where this little question will lead.

"May we expand our little family dinner with Alma? I thought we can have a reunion of the Four Horsemen. I mean we're all in Paris because of the meeting with the EYE and it would be so nice to spend some time with them. You know we're like a family."

Bruce interrupted Daniel's rant: "I believed Henley wanted to take Merrit to Avranches for introducing her boyfriend to her parents. They moved there just a few months ago."

"You know about them? I thought they want to keep it a secret at this time. But I forgot, no one can hide something from you." Daniel stopped cutting the red pepper, looked at his father, grinned and asked: "And what about Jack?"

"I..”, Bruce began before he was interrupted by an ear-deafening sound which sounded like ACDC. And that was definitely nothing Bruce would call music or something like that. He would call the sound a hell riot and that describes perfectly the title which wants to take you on a Highway to Hell.

Daniel nearly cut his finger. He asked startled: "What's that?"

Bruce sighed. "It seems like Tony hacked my Stark phone once again. I don't want to use it but it's for emergencies, for times when the Avengers will be needed.”, he answered while he grasped his phone and tapped on the screen to silence this Hell Phone before the neighbors will complain and call the police. "I mean, serious, how can anyone hear ACDC, not to mention idolizing them?"

"What does he write?" Daniel never met Bruce's friend in person but he heard many stories about him, not to mention all the times he's in the media. Because not a day goes by without a new headline about Tony Stark.

"It seem that there'll be another possibility of spending thanksgiving this year."

"In New York? With the Avengers?” Daniel looked desperately disappointed. "Can`t we do this trip next year? I`d really like to spend this day with our family. And not on a big fair-like feast."

That Bruce didn't sound excited really gave him some hope to set his plan in motion which he had for the little family dinner to surprise his dad.

Bruce's finger flew over the touch screen. "Don't worry, Daniel. I already canceled."

"Good, then I don't have to give notice to Jack."

Bruce looked disbelieving at his son. "Shouldn't you consult me before you start inviting people?"

"Yeah, right! As if I really had to! I thought you knew that Jack's practically a part of our family. And that in more than just one way. In addition he has no one besides us. You know of his past and that he has no family. And last year the Four Horsemen celebrated together.”

Bruce started to speak when suddenly his phone started playing _Highway to hell_ once again. He cursed and took the StarkPhone. Unfortunately just in this moment the sauce started overcooking and he dropped the phone - what a luck that it was hulkproof - to take the jar from the stove.

In the meantime Daniel snatched the phone and tapped wildly on the screen, because he had no other choice if he didn’t want to become deaf. Finally he opened the message.

“What does he write?”

“Sounds really nice. ‘If you’re not celebrating with us we’ll send Fury and Loki to you. They agreed to celebrate with you.”

“ _Nice._ ”, Bruce groaned. “Tony announced practically a disaster in the middle of Paris.”

“Why?”, Daniel asked.

“Because if Loki and Fury are in the same place for an amount of time they automatically start fighting. And then there literally remains no stone on the other.”

 

 

"Oh, no!" Daniel suspected something very bad. "That means we have to go to New York City?"

"Either that or our neighbors are going to lynch us." Bruce admitted.

"And what's with Jack? And Alma? Besides, I thought you didn't even tell them about _me_?"

Bruce sighed loudly."Well, then there'll come a few things up to us. Please give me my phone. I think I have to inform Tony that I need three more seats."

 

Tony starred unbelievably at his screen. "Three more persons? Does Bruce have a wife and children? _My science brother?_ And he dared not to tell me about them. Or perhaps he has a little thing going on with triplets. But....Steve help me!!!! I'm jealous of Bruce!!!!!”

 


	3. The To-Do-List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cheeseburger, cake, cupcakes  
> And Tony tries to get his way (Against Pepper. How can a genius be so dumb?)

"No, Tony there'll be no cheeseburgers at our thanksgiving dinner!" Pepper didn't even need to look up from her memo pad. She didn't like to use the Stark pad because Tony could change the list unauthorized. And it wouldn’t be the first nor the last time.   
"But I want!! I want, I want...It's _my_ party!" Tony pouted like a little child. And there he thought he could _finally_ dictate something while Steve's away on a mission for SHIELD.   
"Forget it, Tony! It's thanksgiving." Natasha bowed down over the coffee table next to Pepper and didn't even acknowledge him with a gaze. "We'll celebrate it in the traditional way."  
"Oh no, but that's so boring," Tony whined. "And since when are you in traditions, Spidy?"   
Natasha raised an eyebrow and replied cooly: "I'm not. I'm Russian. We accept life as it comes. And for everything else - there's vodka!!!"  
"OK, I can live with this part of the plan ... er ... You didn't hear that, Pepper, did you?"   
Pepper snuffled. "You will only play your silly games like nude poker, strip bathing and Fury ludo with lot of alcohol and somethig like that."   
"We didn't play Fury ludo. But that sounds like a good plan." Tony meant.   
"Now back to work! " interrupted Natasha the discussion between the Pepper and Tony. "We've got so far - 8 turkeys, miscellaneous side orders with pumkin, potatoes and carrots, cranberry sauce..."  
"Will there be any kind of pyramid cake?" Tony interrupted.   
Pepper breathed deeply in. She's at the end of her tether. "If you'd like it, Tony. But then you have to find someone who will bake you this cake a month before Christmas. "  
Tony grinned. "That's easy," he said and send a text message to the best baker of the city. Only one minute later there was a snarl behind him.   
"Do you know whereat you bothered me, Stark? "   
"I believe I don't want to know that," Tony said after looking at Loki's light dressed figure. "Only," he added hastily, "if there were any triplets involved."   
Loki smirked widely and singsonged: "Five eyes fewer, Tony - five eyes fewer.”  
Tony stopped this song with a sign that looks like a prevention of all evil and begged: "Please, stop!!! So far and no further. Stop this. That were enough details. I'm already seeing pictures before my eyes that I never wanted to see in my life. "  
Pepper and Natasha were giggling behind their hands while Loki was wandering to Tony's bar. He poured himself a drink and took a sip before he asked him: "Tony, tell me, what's the big emergency you texted me about? What had my brother gotten himself into this time? I thought you knew better than letting him near a microwave."  
"Mmm, the emergency's not about Thor, it's a culinary one. I want you to make me a pyramid cake."  
"Pyramid cake?”, asked Loki uncomprehendingly. “Which stone type should I use? Lime stone or granite?"   
The snicker of the women which slowed down grew stronger again.   
"Do you want a piece of red granite, Sir?", Pepper gasped. "No, I think I take a piece of green rock."   
Loki looked at them with a face which gained a shade of red.  
Natasha knew like everyone else that you rather not do any jokes on Loki's costs - it will end every time with a big destruction - so she declared quickly: "This is a special cake type. Jarvis can explain it to you after our conversation."  
"Yep, we're planning our thanksgiving dinner." Tony explained proudly.  
"And mainly _you_ , Tony.", Pepper teased him.   
"Are there any cheeseburgers involved?", Loki wanted to know.   
Tony smiled widely while Pepper and Natasha negated this plan.   
Loki sighed. “Ok, ladys. Show me what I'll have to cook.” He grabbed Natasha's list.   
"But Loki, the plan wasn't involving you in the cooking. We've already found a very good catering service.”, Pepper said.   
Loki answered with an angry look on his face and a very disappointed tone in his voice to Pepper: "Really? I'm a god! And not any god - I'm the god of lies, the god of mischief and the god of fire! The _hearth_ fire!!!! And don't you dare to insult me with cooking lousy human food if you can have the food of _gods_."  
He breathed deeply in as he continued with a softer tone in his voice. "Now we should occupy ourselves with the important stuff. Especially who will attend so I can plan ahead for the cupcake baking."  
Pepper was very glad that Loki had calmed down but she was always a little nerved about Lokis's obsession with cupcakes. After he tasted them for the first time he declared them to the best thing earth has to offer. And he was a little addicted to them after this attempt. But unfortunately Pepper had to admit that personal cupcakes à la Loki were heavenly.   
"Everyone - except Bruce. Tony? Did Bruce accept the invitation? You wanted to ask him."  
"Naturally, he accepted. How can anyone ever resist my charme?"  
Unfortunately Pepper knew Tony too well. "So you had to threaten him, Tony?"  
"How can anyone threaten the Hulk?", Loki wondered.  
"You don't want to know, Smurf!"

Loki squeezed his eyes. "Tony, you know I'm the god of lies. And I definitely smell a big lie here, so you better tell me."  
That sounded like a threat. And Tony didn't want to explain the ticking time bomb why Bruce's really coming. "I announced him a visit for thanksgiving and suddenly he accepted the offer with bringing company. "  
You could read in Loki's face that he wasn't satisfied with the answer and wanted to know more about the situation but Tony was rescued by a furious Pepper. “You wanted to transfer our thanksgiving dinner to Paris, in Bruce's little appartement? How could you even think about it?"   
Not _really_ the plan but her thoughts would rescue his life. "Perhaps not my best idea.", Tony admitted, trying his best innocent choir boy look.  
Loki, who didn't forget the conversation, asked: "What company?"  
"He didn't tell me. Either triplets or he's got a secret family. But I love the triplets idea more.”  
"You always think with your dick, don't you Tony?” Natasha commented cooly.   
Loki instead focused on Tony. "That means you've got no idea, Stark!"  
"What made you think that." Seeing Loki's raised eyebrows he admitted sheepishly: "Maybe not really about this." He asked Loki with a suppliant look on his face: "You don't want by any chance investigate this for me?"  
Loki sighed. "Ok, I wanted to visit Paris for some time now. It's a good place for mischief. I remember my wonderful time at the opera. Christine was just an angel with a beautiful voice."  
He smirked and bowed down a little in front of the women. "When you finished the list give it to Nicky boy." With this words he vanished and like the cheshire cat his smirk vanished at last.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still no native speakers. If there are any mistakes, feel free to point them out.


	4. Chocolate Cupcake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, Loki asks his spouse for News about Bruce ....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm normally a Frostiron-shipper. But since Raven got Tony for her pairing, I just added Fury to the mix.  
> We hope you enjoy.

Chocolate-Cupcake

 

As his first stop Loki chose the helicarrier. His pumpkin was good in pulling other people’s secrets out of them - in fact really great, for a small black ant.

Then he appeared on the bridge next to Nick and had to admit - again -, that _small_ wasn’t the right word when used for him - his favourite Midgardian dared to be a centimetre taller than him!

“Nicky-darling? Nicky-honey?”

Fury couldn’t be fooled. “What did you do this time, Loki?”, he asked.

“Ohhh, I would never do anything without your consent.”, Loki said deliberately ambiguous and put a chaste kiss on Fury’s cheek, looking like a choir boy.

Fury kept his characteristical straight face. “No, never.”, he said unbelievingly. “And you being called the god of mischief is just a big mistake, too, isn’t it?”

“You’re absolutely right, my sweet little muffin.” Loki turned a little away from Fury and the moment his face wasn’t visible to him anymore he sent a small evil threatening smile to the SHIELD-agents staring with open mouths to pair on the bridge.

Phil couldn’t really blame them for it. He had problems to understand - and even more to _accept_ \- this relationship, and he knew of said one for almost a year now. On the other hand - they should have seen it coming, staring at the lover of a super villain like Loki. And being glared at was mild compared to what Loki was capable of when he wanted to.

“So, what do you want?”, Fury asked gruffly. This could have been his ordinary annoyed self, but was most likely due to him being very aware of Loki staking his claims. “I have other fish to fry than standing idle on this bridge and arguing with you.”

“Oh?” Loki turned to him again and it was plainly to read on his face - which displayed an absolutely enthusiastic grin - that his next line would go under the belt.

Phil prepared himself but nevertheless had to provide his whole self-control when Loki asked: “Would you like to continue this discussion in our bed?”

Fury briefly closed his eyes, took a deep breath and then shot a slightly exasperated look at Loki. “ _Ice cake_.”, he said.

Nothing else, but it had an astonishing effect on the god who melted away immediately. “Yes, my sweetheart?”, asked one of the most dangerous lunatics this world had to offer. Or any other world, strictly speaking.

“What - do - you - want?”

“Och ... nothing really. Just a few informations about Bruce’s housing situation.”

“Since when are you interested in Banner?”

Was Phil mistaken or did he really hear jealousy in his longtime friend’s voice?

Loki at least seemed to be sure. “Jealous, my sweet little chocolate-cupcake?”

It got him one _look_ from Fury that would normally send seasoned veterans running for cover and only brought a chuckle from the god of chaos, before Fury turned to Phil. “Agent Coulson, please make sure that Loki’s getting everything he needs for his investigations.”

 _Why is it always me?_ , Phil thought when he left the bridge with Loki in tow. _I’m playing the babysitter for the Avengers. I’m playing the babysitter for the new SHIELD-rookies. And now I’m playing godsitter ..._

 

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and critics and are most welcome.  
> Also: We're still writing. If there is something you wish to happen, tell us. We will try to include it, if possible.


End file.
